16 Things Sorority Sisters Have Ruined for Me

(Don't worry: Puppies is not one of them.)

The other day I was telling my co-workers why I'm not a huge fan of Lent, and that the whole concept was pretty much ruined for me when my friend told me she heard a sorority girl say, "I have to give up peanut butter for Lent, because it is making me gain weight." That really made me want to run away from the whole idea of Lent. My co-worker Jess said, "sorority girls ruined Green Day for me," (this makes sense because I think she graduated when Green Day was self-destructing and being ruined by the radio and the masses, etc.) and I thought... there is a whole bunch of stuff -- potentially good things -- that I pretty much hate now because I identify them with lots of unpleasant Greek brother and sisters that I went to school with. And here they are. Add your own. (And like, don't get offended if you enjoy Tiffany jewelry or the continent of Australia. I'm admitting that these things are potentially awesome, but have been unjustly ruined for me. My loss.)

1. The pink/green combo
2. J Crew (entirely)
3. Nautical themes (particularly: anchors, whales)
4. The Greek Alphabet (oh, I don't know, say: Delta, Gamma, TKE whatever that stands for, etc.)
5. Hair ribbons
6. Being an asshole to cafeteria workers and maintenance people (oh wait, that was never awesome)
7. Giving blow jobs in bathrooms
8. Particular branches of rap music (the kind that only fosters an environment of people humping eachother)
9. Giving up stuff for Lent
   
10. Collared shirts
11. Large pearl earrings
12. Tiffany jewelry
13. Lily Pulitzer
    
14. The continent of Australia (the place where students who only want a partially exotic study abroad experience go to come back with their lame stories of being drunk on the beach and seeing lots of boobs)
15. Psychology. I have no respect for this field anymore, unless it is studied at a more prestigious level than liberal arts major.
    
16. Nelly's "It's Getting Hot in Herrrre" or "Bring Sexy Back"