This LOL Shit Is Out Of Control

The amount of LOL I see out there concerns me. I recently read a funny status update from a friend and literally laughed out loud.

No fucking around. And I wanted to tell him, LOL, but we have overused LOL to the point that I don't think he would have believed me. We have cried wolf on LOL too many times. This is my imaginary conversation with Mike:

Me: LOL.

Mike: Nice.

Me: But I LOLed. Really, Mike.

Mike: I know. Big deal.

Me: But what you wrote was so funny, that I actually could not suppress my laughter.

Someone that I communicate with for work LOLs at everything I say, and I either do not believe her or am very concerned about her mental state. If she is LOLing as she claims, she must be qualified insane. The people around her must wonder if they need to provide her with a straight jacket. I don't even have to say something funny to get a LOL in reply. Just as I was confessing my LOL to Mike and my qualms with admitting I LOLed, she responded to an e-mail I sent her, in which I agreed to help her with something.

"LOL, I am actually laughing hysterically at my desk and people are looking at me like I am crazy. Ha, ha. Thanks for your help! :)"

It's as if she was reading my mind. "No really," she was saying. "This LOLing is the real shit." I was glad to hear the confirmation. (But borderline worried that she is crazy.)

"We need a "small, earnest chuckle" abbreviation," Mike said. "Or one that indicates, "yeah, you made me smirk, but it wasn't good enough to cause me to emit a sound."

Mike is right. But what? Does anyone have any ideas?

And all of this LOLing seems rather tame compared to its relative, Rolling On The Floor Laughing (ROTFL). Has anyone actually done this? This is getting scary.

"The ramp up now is too excessive," Mike said. "Either I'm laughing out loud or rolling on the floor laughing my ass off. That's not always true! There are nuances."

How true that is. What do we do, guys?